emhawkerblog

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Isn’t it ironic?

By 51 Comments

Ah, Alanis Morissette. Almost twenty years after you released your hit song Ironic, people are still debating it. Are the examples ironic? If not, isn’t the fact that a song titled Ironic doesn’t use ironic examples in fact the best example of irony out there?

I’m not here to weigh in on that. I’m just here to share my version of the song Ironic, complete with actual real-life examples of actual real-life irony from my actual real-life life. (And one or two actual real-life examples of actual real-life non-irony from my actual real-life life.)

Enjoy. Apologies in advance for the earworm. You may still have this song stuck in your head at the end of the week. And isn’t that ironic? (No? Oh. Carry on.)

—-

A grandma
Bought Memory
For her granddaughter
Two years in a row
 
Left: Memory circa Christmas 2010
Right: Memory circa Christmas 2011
 
It’s the onion
In your pasta sauce
The batch you made for your friend
Who can’t eat onion, no
 
And isn’t it ironic?
Don’t you think?
 
It’s like ra-i-ain on the only day
You had vague pla-a-a-ans to actually get out and away
It’s the good advice that your mother-in-law gave
Who would’ve thought? It figures
 
Your neighbours like music
Really loud, what joy!
They turn it u-u-u-u-up
And somehow don’t wake your boy
He sleeps through doof-doof and metal
And you don’t hear a peep
Then on comes ‘Don’t wake me up’ (up up up up up)
And guess who’s no longer asleep?
 
And isn’t it ironic?
Don’t you think?
 
It’s like ra-i-ain on the only day
You had vague pla-a-a-ans to actually get out and away

It’s the good advice that Kyle Sandilands gave
Who would’ve thought? Nah, that couldn’t happen!
 
And life has a funny way of giving examples of irony every day
When everything’s going right
And life has a funny way of giving examples of non-irony every day
And some of those are in this song too
 
Your daughter was tired
But you kept her up just ten minutes more
Now she’s o-o-overtired
And kicking and screaming on the floor
 
She’s got ten thousand clips
But all she wants is a headband
I tried to crowdsource this song
But no-one commented on my facebook status as planned
 
Huh
And isn’t it ironic?
Not those last ones? You don’t think?
Perhaps just more tiredness and exhaustion?
Yeah, I really do think!

 It’s like ra-i-ain on the only day
You had vague pla-a-a-ans to actually get out and away

It’s the good advice that your husband gave
Who would’ve thought? Yeah, that one figures!
 
—-

What ironic event(s) from your life could make it into an Ironic rewrite?

Comments

  2. Oh I cackled at the first example on the Memory game. That is classic irony!! Sorry about your FB let down- FB is a let down every day if you ask me- no one seems to see us. Good job on your lyrical abilities, I always sing “isn’t it *inconvenient*, don’t you think…” 😛 #teamIBOT

    Reply

    • Isn’t it? That one act was the catalyst for this whole song. The grandma in question has also since said ‘I have the memory of a… what animal has a bad memory?’

      (I’m so going to get in trouble when she reads this…)

      Reply

  4. I’ve had this song stuck in my head ever since I watched The Internship a couple of weeks ago!! The memory gift is hilarious!! It’s ridiculous the things that kids can sleep through, but then they get woken by the teensiest noise! Grrr x Karen

    Reply

    • I hope it’s wormed its way out the other side by now! Thanks. (And now I have Peppa Pig in my head instead. Edmond is a clever clogs…)

      Reply

  10. That is excelletn – you are very clever !!!! And yes, now I have “It’s like ra-a-ain, on your wedding day” in my head !!!! But’s that OK because it’s all by itself in there – LOL !
    Have the best day !
    Me

    Reply

  14. I love this! Love it! (and it did rain on my wedding day, which is a sign of fertility, and our honeymoon baby arrived 9 months and 1 day later. Not sure if that’s ironic or just hilarious!)

    Reply

    • Wow, that’s lovely! I’m pretty sure I left some awesome out there for everyone else. Looking forward to your awesome return to the blogging world.

      Reply

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