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Conversations with secrets

October 31, 2013 By Emily 28 Comments

Ashleigh: I’m baking a cake!
Me: Are you?
Ashleigh: YES! But ssshhhh. It’s a secret. I’m not going to tell you.
Me: Oh, okay.
Ashleigh: (whispering) Mummy, it’s a chocolate secret.

My oldest child is three. There are no secrets in our house.

She understands the concepts of secrets. Secrets are things you’re not supposed to tell people yet. Maybe because it’s a surprise for later. Maybe because only certain people are meant to know.

But there’s understanding a concept, and then there’s actually carrying it through. She might understand what secrets are, but she just can’t hold them in. Especially when indulging in her favourite hobby: the why question.

Why can’t I open daddy’s presents mummy?
Why can’t I tell him it’s a hat mummy?
(later)
Why can’t I tell you your present is a hat daddy?

When Cameron and I were trying (and trying) for a second child, we decided very early on not to tell Ashleigh straight away if I fell pregnant. We were definitely going to tell her before anyone else, but only when we were ready for people to know.

That didn’t happen. She knew straight away. In fact, she knew before we did.

Cameron returned home from work one day. We were in the, ahem, post-trying phase of the cycle. I had taken a pregnancy test and it had returned negative, and we were just waiting for the, ahem, cycle reset to arrive so we could get back on the, ahem, case.

Ahem.

Cameron had been giving Ashleigh a bath when he came into the lounge room and stood in front of me, hands on hips.

Cameron: Well?
Me: Well what?
Cameron: Well what?! Do you have something you’d like to tell me?
Me: Ummm…
Cameron: You can’t think of anything you’d like to tell me?
Me: Ummm… no?
Cameron: Our daughter informs me that you are pregnant.
Me: (silence) What?
Cameron: Ashleigh just said ‘Mummy has a baby in her tummy’.
Me: Oh. I – oh – um – I don’t know where that came from. We already know there isn’t.
Cameron: Oh. (sigh)
Me: Sorry, hon.
Cameron: Yeah. Me too.

A week later the, ahem, cycle reset still hadn’t arrived so I took another test. Two blue lines. Pregnant.

Yay! Woohoo! Hooray! And uh-oh. Ashleigh already knows.

Ashleigh broke the news to her music group the next time we attended. And to the checkout person at the supermarket. And to the postie. And our next-door neighbour. And her cousin.

She broke the news to anyone and everyone she saw.

So we told people a little earlier than planned. (Which turned out to be necessary anyway, as I was struggling to hide the baby bump the second time around.)

Ashleigh’s baby-whispering abilities also proved eerily correct when it came to predicting the sex of her sibling. From the get-go, she was convinced it was a boy.

And, of course, told everyone who cared to listen.

And we were delighted to confirm that news at the 20-week scan. Good thing we tend to share that kind of information anyway!

Secrets. No such thing. 


Are there secrets in your house?

Linking with the delightful Josefa at Always Josefa for Conversations over Coffee (or in my case, a hot chocolate).

Conversations over coffee - always josefa

Filed Under: Family life

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Children’s book review – family favourites (November) »

Comments

  1. joeh says

    October 31, 2013 at 6:25 am

    There had better not be any like that one!!

    Reply
    • Emily says

      November 7, 2013 at 3:14 pm

      Not willing to re-enter the world of the newborn?! Fair enough!

      Reply
  2. Renee says

    October 31, 2013 at 7:30 am

    Haha Ashleigh sounds adorable. I love how she told her Daddy what his b’day present was. We’ve had that here before. So hard to keep secrets with a three year old. Funnily enough she kept the secret of her new baby sister’s name for months!

    Reply
    • Emily says

      November 7, 2013 at 3:14 pm

      She’s pretty funny. She always tells him secrets – she even dobs on herself when she’s done something wrong.

      Reply
  3. John James says

    October 31, 2013 at 8:31 am

    I have to admit, I’m a pretty good baby predictor… I have, on a few occasions, looked at a friend of mine and said “I don’t know why, but I think you might be pregnant..” I just get a feeling… and I have been right every time, even before they knew….

    Weird! 🙂

    Reply
    • Emily says

      November 7, 2013 at 3:16 pm

      Lucky you were right or you might not be around to tell those tales!

      Reply
  4. Pip Macdonald says

    October 31, 2013 at 10:55 am

    Secrets – no such thing. Love it 🙂 I’m not sure some even fathom the concept when they do grow to be an adult.

    Reply
    • Emily says

      November 7, 2013 at 3:18 pm

      Ha, you’re right! Especially in these days of facebook. (Man, I sound like a grandma. ‘Back in my day…’)

      Reply
  5. Josefa @always Josefa says

    October 31, 2013 at 12:58 pm

    What a truly beautiful and captivating post! What a clever little girl you have there, she is so in tune to her world and those she loves, nothing can be a secret for her – she loves you guys too much! I love the dialogue in this Em, captured me the whole time Thank you so much for linking up to #convocoffee Josefa

    Reply
    • Emily says

      November 7, 2013 at 3:20 pm

      Thank you, that’s so lovely. I like your way of looking at it. She loves me too much? Yep, I’ll take it! x

      Reply
  6. Emma Fahy Davis says

    October 31, 2013 at 11:08 pm

    No secrets in our house, and if my children ever tell me I’m pregnant, I think I’ll leave home!

    Reply
    • Emily says

      November 7, 2013 at 3:21 pm

      HAHAHAHA! That’ll learn ’em!

      Reply
  7. hopefulraeofsunshine says

    October 31, 2013 at 11:41 pm

    awww I love this Emily so gorgeous….how cute that she bursts with secrets xx

    Reply
    • Emily says

      November 7, 2013 at 3:22 pm

      Always bursting with secrets. And yes, always cute.

      Reply
  8. Lani says

    November 1, 2013 at 10:35 am

    No secrets, just surprises from our three-year old. Such a beautiful age 🙂

    Reply
    • Emily says

      November 7, 2013 at 3:24 pm

      Beautiful indeed. It just gets better every day!

      Reply
  9. Julie says

    November 1, 2013 at 2:32 pm

    Lol. Gotta love kids. Yep, no secrets around here, but thankfully our children have not been quite as intuitive as your little girl!

    Reply
    • Emily says

      November 7, 2013 at 3:26 pm

      Haha, well it’s lucky she was or I would have started getting even sadder when my clothes stopped fitting and I wasn’t feeling well!

      Reply
  10. Lila Wolff says

    November 1, 2013 at 7:06 pm

    Love the chocolate secret that’s hilarious!

    Reply
    • Emily says

      November 7, 2013 at 3:28 pm

      She’s pretty funny about that sort of thing! Everything’s a ‘secret’ that is immediately told, but then still unveiled later.

      Reply
  11. Rhian @melbs says

    November 1, 2013 at 10:10 pm

    How funny that she just knew. That is amazing.

    Reply
    • Emily says

      November 7, 2013 at 3:28 pm

      I know! Thank goodness she never announced that there were four babies in my tummy or something like that – I would have fainted!

      Reply
  12. theviblog says

    November 2, 2013 at 11:19 pm

    Your completely correct – they are incapable of holding anything in! Does she go to kindy or daycare? My boys always told the best secrets to their kindy teachers. I would only find out when I’d go to pick them up and they’d say things like “Jack tells me there’s a mouse in your kitchen” or “Oscar says you have pizza and beer for dinner every night” (we’d had it ONCE that week I hasten to clarify).

    Reply
    • Emily says

      November 7, 2013 at 3:38 pm

      She starts kinder next year (not a moment too soon!) and I’m simultaneously delighted and terrified.

      Reply
  13. Katie Oliveira da Silveira says

    November 3, 2013 at 10:11 am

    So cute – yes, same in our house with my nearly 4 year old…she says secrets in a whisper thinking that makes it ok. CONGRATULATIONS on bub number two, Em! xo

    Reply
    • Emily says

      November 7, 2013 at 3:41 pm

      Thanks Katie! We’re so glad to have Mitchell in our lives.

      Reply
  14. Emily @ Have A Laugh On Me says

    November 4, 2013 at 5:43 pm

    I wonder how she knew, it’s kinda cool and scary at the same time. And NO secrets here EVER lovely – we have to be so careful what we say or do because it’s fodder for teachers, checkout chicks and grandparents! 🙂

    Reply
    • Emily says

      November 7, 2013 at 3:50 pm

      It’ll be interesting to see what else she picks up on!

      Reply

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Hi! I’m Emily

I parent. I write. I blog. I play with words and numbers in my head. Constantly. It's crowded in there.

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