We’ve clicked past the five month mark. Five months since we became a family of four.
Things are going well. We don’t have a routine – no on the hour, every hour rituals – but we have a general daily pattern, and life gets easier by the day.
Nights are still interrupted, but it’s easier to deal with little sleep when the days are more enjoyable.
It’s easier to deal with little sleep when you simply feel tired instead of completely and utterly exhausted.
Exhaustion makes you do silly things. Ridiculous things. Things that I shared with my Facebook followers. And, while writing this post about tiredness and exhaustion, I thought the best way to demonstrate the extremes was to show you those status updates.
I’m sorry if this seems lazy. But having them all in one place here really does paint a funny picture. Enjoy reading my post-birth timeline of exhaustion.
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You know you’re tired when you shower with your glasses on.
You know you’re exhausted when you don’t realise until you’re done.
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You know you’re tired when the microwave beeps and you open the fridge.
You know you’re exhausted when you continue to search the shelves for your Weet Bix.
You know you’re the walking dead when the microwave beeps again and you yell, “I KNOW, I’M LOOKING FOR IT!”
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You know you’re tired when you mistake the siren of a passing ambulance for the cries of your child.
You know you’re exhausted when, after realising it was an ambulance, you go to get your child out of bed anyway.
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You know you’re tired when you forget that your phone is in your back pocket.
You know you’re exhausted when you call it to find it, and it takes you a while to realise your butt cheek is ringing.
You know you’re the walking dead when you hang up, pull your phone out of your pocket, and think, “Oh, missed call. I wonder who tried to call me.”
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You know you’re tired when you put a pot of water on the stove to boil, but forget to turn the heat on.
You know you’re exhausted when you realise this, laugh at yourself, then forget to do it AGAIN.
You know you’re the walking dead when you finally turn the heat on, boil the water, then drain it… before you’ve added the pasta.
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You know you’re tired when, after you make a cup of Milo, you put the kettle in the fridge.
You know you’re exhausted when you don’t realise until you’re trying to plug the milk into the kettle heating unit.
You know you’re the walking dead when you sigh, swap the milk and the kettle, then turn back to your drink… only to realise you hadn’t yet added the milk.
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You know you’re tired when you search your entire house for your glasses before realising they’re on your face.
You know you’re exhausted when you try to take your glasses off, fumbling at the sides of your face and even poking around your ears for a good forty seconds before you realise you’re no longer wearing them.
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You know you’re less tired than usual when you tell your friends that you ‘only’ got six hours’ sleep the night before.
You know you’re almost feeling normal (if top-heavy) when your child puts on an occasional eleven-hour stretch of sleep.
And you know you’ve got it made when your bub manages to synchronise one of his naps with that of his sister.
Life is pretty good at the moment. Loving my cherubs. *contented sigh*
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Have you ever done something silly while tired or exhausted? Please share. It can’t be worse than any of my examples!
When I had a new baby, I went to the local harvey norman to print out photos and waited for 15mins while they printed. I started chatting with a lady and before I was about to leave she asked me what the deal was with my shoes. I looked down and realised I was wearing one thong and one shoe!
HAHAHA! CRACKER!
Very Funny!! I found I could easily change OLD for Tired for many of these.
You mean this is going to get worse?! NOOO!
“You know you’re the walking dead when you hang up, pull your phone out of your pocket, and think, “Oh, missed call. I wonder who tried to call me.”
PMSL!!! Omg it’s like when I email something to myself then see the (1) in my inbox and think “YAY! MAIL!!! ….. oh shit. It’s from me.”
LOL – I do that too – and shake my head every time !!!
Haha, I haven’t done that yet! Touch wood.
I’m exhausted just reading all that! I don’t miss the exhaustion of two young ones that’s for sure. Our youngest starts school next year and I’m a mix of missing baby and excited Mum at the moment. But exhaustion is usually self inflicted these days, by trying to do too much!
Yes, there’s that too. Sitting up to watch Q&A tonight even though I should REALLY go to bed…
Oh dear, these are great. We were so tired when Twitchette came along and decided to be a two-hourly waker, that in between we fell so hard asleep one weekend morning we slept right through a neighbour banging on the door to tell us our dog had not stopped barking. That is a good effort. Thanks, Lady. #teamIBOT
Well done on the sleep, though!
There are some of those that are applicable to me and I don’t even have a little baby and toddler to contend with !!!
Have the best day and good luck with getting more sleep.
Me
Thank you, I will try to have a good day and I will definitely try to get more sleep!
I can so relate, I still feel exhausted, but just in the past week – ALL THREE of mine have slept through – TOUCH A HUGE PILE OF WOOD!
Thanks for the giggle! And 6 hours is a marathon sleep for me too x
Touching every timber item in my house right now. Well, not really – I’m not that flexible. x
Last week I jumped in the shower with my socks on! I know how you feel!
HAHA! Some of these examples are much funnier than my own!
Oh that’s hilarious! There really is nothing like the brain melt of a new baby. I poured milk into my berroca the other morning. Thankfully I woke up before I actually drank it x
Oh, thank goodness you didn’t drink it! Yuck. I’ve poured orange juice onto my cereal, but also realised in time!
That so funny! I can totally relate to that level of tiredness, thank goodness my brain has returned to normal function, well not as new as it was before kids!
Yeah, I get the feeling it will never return to its former razor sharpness. (What? It was razor sharp, I swear! Okay, okay, you got me.)
Haha, these are great. Just yesterday I was visiting my Granny in hospital and I got out on the wrong floor not once, but twice. Thankfully I realised my mistake pretty quickly and didn’t have to wait for another lift.
Haha! I would have gotten out and pretended then waited for another lift.
Sadly I have done some of these things without the excuse of tiny children and interrupted sleep.
Last week I attempted to put the hand mixer in the fridge. Not sure what I was thinking!
I think when you’ve got four kids you can claim baby brain for life.
Classic! So so funny! The microwave / fridge scenario is a familiar one for me! Thanks for sharing Em.
I’ve done it again since. Realised sooner, though. PROGRESS.
Ha! I can soooo relate, Emily. My worst exhausted mum thing to do was leaving Lottie at the checkout and not even realising I was pushing a trolley not a pram for about 20 minutes! Good times. x
Oh no! I haven’t done that, but I’ve rocked many an empty trolley while at the checkout. And once, a loaf of bread.
I laughed at every songle one, because guess what, I relate to every. single. one.
I thought I was the only idiot who did this though: “You know you’re the walking dead when you hang up, pull your phone out of your pocket, and think, “Oh, missed call. I wonder who tried to call me.””
….glad to know I’m not! xox
I’m still doing it! But shhhh, don’t tell anyone. Too embarrassing.
OMG I was laughing through this entire post – I feel for you! And gulp a bit at the thought of going through all this fun stuff again (trying for number 2 as we speak) – am I crazy?!! Very funny :)This is my mama blog, and you have also met me at my writing blog (emilymorganwrites.com)
Not crazy. Just let yourself off the hook for the crazies that happen. x
This post made me giggle. I am so glad that I’m past that sleepless stage; it really was torture. I really don’t know how my youngest grew to be such a strapping lad with the amount he DIDN’T sleep as a baby.
Good to know, because I swear my little one gets less sleep every day!
This made me laugh. In complete recognition. I especially loved your microwave retort x
Oh yeah, I showed that microwave who’s boss!
Hahaha this is hilarious!!! Hope you start to get a bit more sleep too… although would it be selfish to say I hope you stay a little sleep deprived so we continue to be able to read more of your little gems!!! 🙂
I’ve got plenty more. Already planning a second instalment – stay tuned!
Enjoyed this a lot! So relatable!
Thank you!
Honestly… I really remember these days and can sympathise wholeheartedly. There IS light at the end of the tunnel and it’s great you can still see the funny side 🙂
Yes, heading towards that light now! Thank you.
Visitng from the DP Carnival and got great laughs out of your post. It’s so good to know your not the only vague person in the world!
Prior to becoming a mum I was a shiftworker. Great training for the sleep deprivation of parenthood! I have done some silly things being exhausted – usually it’s wearing clothes inside out in public or different shoes! The scariest thing is when you drive somewhere absolutely exhausted and not remember how you got there or whether you stopped for all the red lights!
Dani.
Inside out! YES! I mean, haha, I have no idea what you’re talking about. I’d never do that…
Actually, I don’t think I have, but I KNOW I’ve worn yesterday’s pants complete with baby spew stains before!
The upside of exhaustion is you just don’t care! And that has to be a positive. Somehow.
Somehow! Thanks for the silver lining.
Love the idea of you (or anyone) scrambling around with a ringing bum.
Hope you are getting some more sleep now.
I am, thanks Ed! Hang on to that idea. It happens more often than I’d like to admit.
Yes, I also was once informed by a daycare worker that my shorts were on inside out. Went to work another time with one navy blue shoe and one black one, well that’s close, right!
At least it wasn’t red and black! Thanks for sharing.
Oh Emily! You have made me realise I have had a pretty good run with becoming a mother. Never quite made the ‘walking dead’ level! Very funny post.
I’m glad not everyone goes to that extreme!
This is just as funny, if not funnier the second time around, and SOO creative – bloody ambulances!!!!!!!!!!! x
Bless your gorgeousness for visiting again! Glad you liked it. x
I’ve definitely done the glasses in the shower. And I forget my phone ALL the time. I’ve also developed a habit of talking about myself out loud, in the third person. Then I find myself announcing ‘Mummy is going to have dinner now’… to an empty room.
Thank goodness I’m not the only one to shower with glasses on. I felt like the biggest nuffer going around!
I can totally relate to this one! When does it end? I believe there is a short window of normality before you’re up all night again waiting up for them. Cheers for the giggle! Robo X
When does it end? SOON PLEASE!
Loved this the first time, loved reading it again!
Another repeat visitor? You girls ROCK! x
Thanks for the laugh today! I can relate to so many of these things. How do any of our kids make it to adulthood when their parents are zombies? Good luck with those synchronised sleeps!
Pleasure! And yes, how do our kids survive when we barely feel like we do?!
“I know I’m looking for it!” made me spit wine and choke on it. Wine in the nose is not good! But thanks for the laugh!
Happy to help with the laughter! If I didn’t laugh, I’d cry. So I’ll take laughter!
Oh my goodness so true…as Mums it sucks we have to go through that utter exhaustion! Sleep becomes a precious commodity! Monique (via the DP Blog Carnival) xx
Sleep will forever remain a precious commodity. And a rare one, I fear!
I’m guilty! the boiling water, the mised phone calls.. its all a blur sometimes!
http://www.dancingthroughsunday.typepad.com
x
13 months on and I am still doing some of this stuff thanks to the toddler who has decided that sleep is for the weak and keeps waking up at 1am wanting to get up! And I am constantly getting in the shower with my glasses on! Or weirdly, going to the toilet and just after I start peeing I suddenly think “Oh shit!” then feel relieved because I am in fact sitting on the toilet, not lying in bed like I thought I was for a split-second! Sleep deprivation does strange things to the mind!
I can relate to far too many of these at the moment. I’m that exhausted I can barely function. Having hubby at sea isn’t helping. Just concentrating on getting the girls to school and food on the table. Anything else, including blogging is a bonus.
Oh my. Yes to all. I remember 3 separate occasions of showering with underwear on, as well.