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This is how we do

April 28, 2015 By Emily 64 Comments

I haven’t done a song rewrite for a while. And every time I hear Katy Perry’s song, This is How we Do (which, thanks to my daughter’s taste in music, is more often than I really need to), I can’t help thinking about how totally not like that song my life is.

Chanel this, Chanel that? Yeah, perhaps if I had a Maserati to hop in, I could afford some Chanel too!

Buying grog with rent money? More like hoping I remember my PIN to pay for petrol at the service station.

Going to bed with a 10 and waking up with a 2? Have you met my husband? He’s always a 10! (You’re welcome, honey.)

So I made a version that is like my life. Except for the costume.

This is how we do triple

So here it is. Enjoy. At least I can guarantee you’ll laugh, one way or the other! (And you’ll find the lyrics below the clip if you want to sing along too.)

Sipping on coffee
Sun not yet up, already hear my baby
Got five hours’ sleep, new record for me
Feeling fresh as a daisy

Settling kids down all night long
Everything all blurry and hazy
Poonami this, vomit that
Hell no, both my kids, smelling lovely, baby

It’s no big deal
It’s no big deal
It’s no big deal
This is no big deal

This is how we do, yeah
Cleaning, wiping, new nappy
Yeah we do it like that
This is how we do (do do do do)
This is how we do

This is how we do, yeah
Changing linen, rub tummies
Yeah we do it like that
This is how we do (do do do do)
This is how we do

Eye bags and unwashed hair
My tribe hopping in my Toyota Kluger
Wearing Kmart chic beside the kinder mum clique
Looking more like Freddy Krueger

Now I’m getting dinner ready
Chopping veggies as small as they’ll go
Won’t eat this, won’t eat that, what’s this?
They won’t eat anything! No, no! (NO NO!)

It’s no big deal
It’s no big deal
It’s no big deal
This is no big deal

This is how we do, yeah
Peeling, chopping, sauteeing
Yeah we do it like that
This is how we do (do do do do)
This is how we do

This is how we do, yeah
Serving, pleading, cajoling
Yeah we do it like that
This is how we do (do do do do)
This is how we do

This one goes out to the parents
At school drop-off… in last night’s pyjamas
Yuh-huh, I see you

Yo, this goes out to all you folk
With a dirty nappy in the boot from last Friday
And it’s Tuesday

Yo, shout out to all you parents
Buying coffee with your kids’ piggy bank money!
RESPECT

This is how we do, yeah
Bathing, scrubbing, pyjamas
Yeah we do it like that
This is how we do (do do do do)
This is how we do

This is how we do, yeah
Reading, singing, turn lights off
Yeah we do it like that
This is how we do (do do do do)
This is how we do

This goes out to all you people
Dragging yourselves to bed at 10
And getting woken at 2
Hah, that’s me!

This is how we do, yeah
Sending kids off to the grandies
Yeah we do it like that
This is how we do

What?
Wait
No, no, no, no
Bring the kids back

 

Your turn! What ‘classic’ pop song needs rewriting to reflect the lives of parents?

Filed Under: Rewrites, Songs Tagged With: family, Katy Perry, music, parenting, parody, song, This is how we do

« Why I’m not a fashion and beauty blogger
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Comments

  1. Lydia C. Lee says

    April 28, 2015 at 7:03 am

    Hilarious!! Get ready to make your millions!! (LOVE the school drop off in PJ’s bit!)

    Reply
    • Emily says

      April 28, 2015 at 4:53 pm

      I doubt it, but thanks for the vote of confidence!

      Reply
  2. Lauren @ Create Bake Make says

    April 28, 2015 at 7:22 am

    Love it!! And I *may* have found a nappy in the boot of our car yesterday from the weekend ……

    Reply
    • Emily says

      April 28, 2015 at 5:10 pm

      I swear they hide on purpose! That line took no effort to rewrite.

      Reply
  3. Gael - The Vinyl Edition says

    April 28, 2015 at 7:22 am

    Well, there’s another writing skill to add.
    That’s funny! I needed a bit of nuttiness this morning (as long as it wasn’t me doing the nuttiness). Thanks for the laugh, Em.

    Reply
    • Emily says

      April 29, 2015 at 7:54 pm

      Thanks Gael. Love me my song rewrites! Glad you enjoyed it.

      Reply
  4. Deb @ inner compass designs says

    April 28, 2015 at 7:26 am

    You rock!!!! Love it

    Reply
    • Emily says

      April 29, 2015 at 8:14 pm

      Thanks Deb. I’m so glad people are enjoying it! Was so nervous.

      Reply
  5. Amy @ HandbagMafia says

    April 28, 2015 at 7:38 am

    This is gold Em. Love it!

    Reply
    • Emily says

      April 29, 2015 at 8:38 pm

      Thanks Amy!

      Reply
  6. Vicki - the fashionable m says

    April 28, 2015 at 8:02 am

    Oh this is too funny, love it!!

    Reply
    • Emily says

      April 29, 2015 at 8:39 pm

      Thanks Vicki, glad you enjoyed it.

      Reply
  7. Renee Wilson says

    April 28, 2015 at 8:37 am

    As always, you are awesome! One talented lady that’s for sure!

    Reply
    • Emily says

      April 29, 2015 at 8:40 pm

      Thank you (and thanks for being half of my test audience xxxx).

      Reply
  8. Ness says

    April 28, 2015 at 9:14 am

    Ha ha! Not familiar with the Katy Perry song but your version made me giggle. Nice work!

    Reply
    • Emily says

      April 29, 2015 at 8:41 pm

      Thanks Ness. If I can make someone who hasn’t heard the original laugh, I’m winning!

      Reply
  9. Lauren @ The Thud says

    April 28, 2015 at 11:25 am

    OMG you’re a crack up! And you can sing! I’d love to do something like this but no one would watch for more than 15 seconds because my voice is that bad.

    I love it Em! I want more!

    Reply
    • Emily says

      April 29, 2015 at 8:42 pm

      Thanks Lauren! I wouldn’t call this clip a great example of being able to sing, but I’ll take it! Must get better on the tech side of things.

      Reply
  10. Malinda @mybrownpaperpackages says

    April 28, 2015 at 1:01 pm

    What great fun. I think with kids in the house I tend to sing everything to any song.

    Reply
    • Emily says

      April 29, 2015 at 8:44 pm

      Thanks Malinda – me too! Everything we do gets set to music.

      Reply
  11. EssentiallyJess says

    April 28, 2015 at 2:49 pm

    You know I think you’re brilliant!
    Sound is good too. xx

    Reply
    • Emily says

      April 29, 2015 at 8:45 pm

      Thank you (to the other half of my test audience xxxx).

      Reply
  12. Raychael aka Mystery Case says

    April 28, 2015 at 3:45 pm

    I’m impressed! I really wanted to do a parody of BOP Girl for the blog but the legal side of it and fees involved getting permission from writers, management and record agencies were off putting to say the least.

    Reply
    • Emily says

      April 29, 2015 at 8:55 pm

      Thanks Raychael! Not familiar with BOP girl. And gulp! I checked up on all that, although not super in-depth I’ll admit. But being a parody, having rewritten the lyrics and clearly poking fun at the original intent of the song suggested I’d be okay.

      Reply
  13. Natalie @ our parallel connection says

    April 28, 2015 at 4:15 pm

    You are hilarious and yet so serious at the time…. I can’t stop singing it … My kids are yelling at me to stop

    Reply
    • Emily says

      April 29, 2015 at 8:58 pm

      Ah, but it’s a very serious topic! Ha! Thanks Nat. Please record yourself and upload it – let’s get it trending!!

      Reply
  14. JodiGibson (@JFGibsonWriter) says

    April 28, 2015 at 9:33 pm

    Blow me away every time. This one’s going viral for sure!

    Reply
    • Emily says

      April 29, 2015 at 9:04 pm

      Ha, thanks Jodi! And if 30 views means viral, then MISSION ACCOMPLISHED! x

      Reply
  15. Shannon @ Dash of Tonic says

    April 28, 2015 at 11:12 pm

    Love it! You did a great job. (And brought back memories of when I used to change the words to songs in High School)

    Reply
    • Emily says

      April 29, 2015 at 9:08 pm

      Thanks Shannon! Yes, high school was an excellent apprenticeship for song rewriting. Parenthood has rekindled the skills!

      Reply
  16. Janet aka Middle Aged Mama says

    April 29, 2015 at 1:45 pm

    Ha! Great lyrics and you totally rock it!!!!

    AND Yay for Kmart Chic 😉

    Visiting today from #teamIBOT X

    Reply
    • Emily says

      April 29, 2015 at 9:09 pm

      Oh yeah! GO KMART! (That really was a Kmart top, too! HA! Skirt not so much.)

      Reply
  17. Bec @ The Plumbette says

    April 29, 2015 at 2:24 pm

    You’ve got it going good Em! Thanks for the laugh! Xx

    Reply
    • Emily says

      April 29, 2015 at 9:09 pm

      Thanks Bec – glad you laughed!

      Reply
  18. Danielle L says

    April 29, 2015 at 8:48 pm

    Go you Em, this is very awsome. And you can sing!

    Reply
    • Emily says

      April 29, 2015 at 9:11 pm

      Thanks! Again, that’s a generous description of the ‘singing’ in this video, but I’ll take it!

      Reply
  19. Danielle L says

    April 29, 2015 at 8:48 pm

    Go you Em, this is very awesome. And you can sing!

    Reply
    • Emily says

      May 4, 2015 at 1:30 pm

      Thanks Danielle!

      Reply
  20. Peachy Keen Mumma - Jess says

    May 1, 2015 at 9:14 am

    You win funnest blogger of the year!! YEAH!

    Reply
    • Emily says

      May 4, 2015 at 1:34 pm

      WOOHOO! I’ve always wanted to win that one! Thank you.

      Reply
  21. Deborah says

    May 1, 2015 at 11:34 am

    Oh I love it. I haven’t seen one of your parodies before. You’ve got a great voice and I love the replacement lyrics.

    Fabulous! Congrats!

    Deb

    Reply
    • Emily says

      May 4, 2015 at 10:02 pm

      Thanks Deb – there hasn’t been one to see before because I’ve been too shy! Just the lyrics before. Thanks for the supportive words.

      Reply
  22. Sammie @ The Annoyed Thyroid says

    May 1, 2015 at 1:28 pm

    Katy Perry eat your heart out! I see a chart topper in your future!

    Reply
    • Emily says

      May 4, 2015 at 10:03 pm

      Wouldn’t that be nice? Actually, given how I cringe whenever hubby plays this one back to me, probably not!

      Reply
  23. Maxabella says

    May 1, 2015 at 8:06 pm

    Girl can sing!!! So fun and clever, Em. I hope you catch a virus. x

    Reply
    • Emily says

      May 4, 2015 at 10:03 pm

      *cough cough* Nope, false alarm. x

      Reply
  24. Allison Tait says

    May 1, 2015 at 9:09 pm

    Okay – now for the YouTube sensation!

    Reply
    • Emily says

      May 4, 2015 at 10:03 pm

      Sensation is overstating it, but thanks!

      Reply
  25. Zoe Meunier says

    May 1, 2015 at 9:16 pm

    Hilarious… and sadly oh so true! How about some more Katy Perry re-lyricking…

    I got the eyes of an old lush, they’re bloodshot
    Kid wouldn’t sleep, full of snot
    Yes I am exhausted
    And you’re gonna hear me snoooore!

    Reply
    • Emily says

      May 4, 2015 at 10:04 pm

      BAHAHAHAHAHA! This is fantastic. Sno-o-o-o-ore! Brilliant. Want to collaborate on the next one?!

      Reply
  26. Sandra Kelly says

    May 1, 2015 at 10:41 pm

    Ha ha that’s bloody brilliant! And you can sing gurlfran!!! Sooo good. 🙂

    Reply
    • Emily says

      May 4, 2015 at 10:04 pm

      Thanks Sandra! Glad you enjoyed it.

      Reply
  27. Vanessa says

    May 1, 2015 at 11:27 pm

    Oh this is brilliant! Finally – a Katy Perry song I can relate to! x

    Reply
    • Emily says

      May 4, 2015 at 10:05 pm

      Just call me Emmy Perry. (But don’t really.)

      Reply
  28. Mumma McD says

    May 2, 2015 at 7:10 am

    Brilliant! This is my life!!

    Reply
    • Emily says

      May 4, 2015 at 10:05 pm

      Woohoo, I’m not alone! I mean, I’m so sorry. It’ll get better.

      Reply
  29. Lauren @ Life at Number Five says

    May 2, 2015 at 12:45 pm

    Oh Em this is hilarious!! Although I must admit, there is a little voice inside my head whispering “this will be your life soon!!”
    Reading posts on parenting simultaneously make me look forward to having my baby and make me want to enjoy every last second of child-free time I get!

    Reply
    • Emily says

      May 4, 2015 at 10:06 pm

      And both are true. You will wonder how you ever lived without them, and dream of once again living without them. (But pre-them, not getting rid of them. That sounded far more terrible than it was supposed to. But I’m still going to hit ‘post comment’.)

      Reply
  30. Sonia Life Love Hiccups says

    May 2, 2015 at 3:24 pm

    Look out You Tube… there is a new star on the rise 😉 xx

    Reply
    • Emily says

      May 4, 2015 at 10:06 pm

      It’s not rising very far just yet, but thanks for the vote of confidence! x

      Reply
  31. Em says

    May 3, 2015 at 1:04 am

    Made my night. You are gold!

    Reply
    • Emily says

      May 4, 2015 at 10:07 pm

      Thank you so much! Glad it was entertaining.

      Reply
  32. Zita says

    May 3, 2015 at 4:54 pm

    Great stuff Em!! Very funny! you have a great voice!

    Reply
    • Emily says

      May 4, 2015 at 10:07 pm

      Thanks Zita. And looking forward to meeting you this weekend!

      Reply

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Hi! I’m Emily

I parent. I write. I blog. I play with words and numbers in my head. Constantly. It's crowded in there.

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